If there’s one thing guaranteed to cloud your judgement on a first date, it’s lust. When your date is super hot and flirty, it’s easy to forget that you’ve only just met them. So I’ve put together my top tips for staying safe on a first date. Following these 7 simple tips will protect you from leaving yourself vulnerable on a date, so you can focus on having fun.
You’re getting ready for a hotly anticipated first date.
Sexy outfit? Check.
Safety precautions? Hhhhmmm, not so much. I’m all for being trusting, but putting some simple safety precautions in place when going to meet a stranger is a no-brainer.
As a dating coach and matchmaker, my top priority is to empower you to find a deep connection. It’s so much easier to relax and let love flow when you know the dos and don’ts of staying safe on a date. .
The 7 dos and don’ts of staying safe on a first date
1. Do tell someone you trust about your date plans
This sounds obvious, but making sure people you trust know the details of your date is super important.
Always let flatmates, friends and family know when you plan to go out on a date. Give all the specific information about where you are meeting, who you’re going with (ideally including your date’s name and phone number) and when you expect to be home. If anything changes during the course of the evening, let them know right away.
I suggest arranging to call or text your trusted people at a set time to confirm that everything is going well (also, it’s just more fun when you can share your excitement about how awesome your date is with someone).
2. Do meet in a public place
Make sure you set your date for a public place where you know for sure there’ll be lots of other people around.
Don’t arrange to meet at their apartment whatever you do! Arrange to meet at a familiar cafe or restaurant, or somewhere you tend to hang out anyway (this has the added bonus of relaxing you further too).
Not only will this decrease your chances of being put in an unsafe situation, but other people may also remember you being in that location, in the event something does happen to you.
3. Do pre-plan your route home
Thinking about how you’re going to get home is a wise move. I wouldn’t advise accepting a lift from your date (yes, even if it’s convenient). Be confident about how you are getting home and Uber it, drive your own car or make sure you know the last Tube times! Not only will you have a quick getaway if things feels a bit off, but you’re also keeping your home address hidden from your date.
4. Do take your mobile phone
Obvious, right? But please make sure your mobile phone has plenty of battery so that you can call someone if you need to. You can use it to text that the date is going well, but also for more serious reasons if something feels a bit off.
My pro tip is to take a selfie with your date and send it to a friend. That way you have their photo should anything go wrong.
5. Don’t leave your drink unattended
No one wants to think of their date slipping something into their drink (such as gamma hydroxybutyrate or Rohypnol which are odorless and colourless date rape drugs) but sadly it does happen.
Play it safe and don’t accept a drink from your date unless you open it yourself or watch it being prepared by a bartender.
If you need to go to the bathroom, finish your drink first. And remember to take your handbag, phone or wallet with you for extra security.
And with the risk of sounding like the millionaire matchmaker, Irecommend two drinks tops. Let’s face it, alcohol lowers your inhibitions and can make you do things you wouldn’t usually. So stay on the safe side and alternate your drinks with non-alcoholic ones. (Or don’t drink at all – check out my blog on dating sober for more on that).
6. Don’t meet at your house or workplace
Connected to rule number 1 to meet in a public place, it’s important that your date doesn’t know where you live until you get to know and trust them.
It’s best not to divulge your address just yet, or agree to a ‘Netflix and Chill’ hangout at their place. It’s just too risky, so save the home dates until you know your date much better.
8. Do leave if you feel uncomfortable
If you feel uncomfortable at any point, get out of there! No hesitation needed; ONE red flag is enough. Watch out for anything they say, do or imply that makes you think twice (think dodgy comments, acting overly familiar too quickly, or anything that sets off your instincts) and act quickly.
If you feel comfortable hot-footing it out of there and can hop straight in a Uber, go for it. Or text a friend to come and meet you. Uber even has a brilliant function where you can share your trip as well, so if on your way home you can alert your friend. Genius!
If you feel more comfortable having an “out” in case the date goes awry, tell your date that you to leave to meet your friends afterwards.
There’s no need to feel guilty or rude, just make your excuses and leave. Your safety is most important.
I hope you’ll keep these simple tips and rules in mind on your next date. Remember to always, always trust your instincts and act accordingly. Happy dating, gorgeous.
I’m Asa Baav, a dating coach and matchmaker for 30+ professional singles in London who are tired of swiping and want a deep connection. Make sure you’re signed up to my email newsletter to find out about my orgasmic events and dating tips.