As a monthly contributor to Killing Kittens we are this month talking about edging.
Think you know everything there is to know about masturbation? Think again! Dating coach, matchmaker and founder of Tailor Matched, Asa Baav says experimentation is essential for a healthy sex life, with self-pleasure the best way to explore what turns you on and have hotter sex. Read on for Asa’s guide to edging, aka the practice and art of building up to a super intense orgasm!
It’s so easy to think of masturbation as a route to a quick tension-reducing orgasm. But your self-pleasure practice has so much more in store for you – when you slow down enough to truly open up to orgasmic bliss.
Think of masterbation as less about simply getting in and getting off, but about having a pleasure-based mindset, full of curiosity and self-discovery. When it comes to orgasm, the longer you hold off, the more intense it can be.
What is ‘edging’?
One way to experiment with your self-pleasure is edging. Also called surfing, peaking or teasing, it is the practice of stopping yourself from reaching orgasm right when you’re on the cusp or “edge” of a sexual climax.
I can personally attest to the power of edging. It’s a learning process, but practice patience and you will be rewarded with so much more sensation. It can be truly mind-blowing!
Edging for everyone!
For those with penises, the appeal of edging is often that sexual encounters last longer. If you dream of making love all night long, edging allows you to stay in a heightened state of sexual arousal. Building up arousal allows people with vulvas time to warm up, and increases the chances they’ll have their own orgasm. That really is win-win.
So if you sometimes feel like masterbation is a rush towards a quick orgasm and want more, here’s how to practice edging, whether you have a penis or a vagina.
How to practice edging
- Give yourself a little more time for masterbation – this isn’t for rushing. Set the scene with some sexy oils, maybe a little mood lighting – romance yourself!
- When you’re right on the edge of hitting your climax, stop or slow down what you’re doing. This may feel like agony but just remember “More intense orgasm. More intense organsm” – this is your new masterbation mantra!
- Wait about 30 seconds, but stay aroused with deep breathing or a different kind of touch to your body. Experiment with touching parts of your body that usually get ignored when you’re masterbating. If you usually use firm touch, try feather-light, or vice-versa.
- For those with penises, you could try the “squeeze” method where, when you’re close to orgasm, squeeze the tip of the penis for about 30 seconds.
- Begin the more intensely stimulating sexual activity again. Then repeat the process of slowing down and stopping when you’re ready to climax.
- People with penises might go from hard to soft and back during this process – that’s all good.
- If you feel yourself getting frustrated – breathe, breathe, breathe and let the sensations wash through your body.
- Repeat this process for as long as you can – three or four times should do it – but it’s worth noting that the longer you practice the better your end result will be.
- When you finally release, the orgasm should feel like a stronger, more fuller-bodied experience.
With the edging method, you might just surprise yourself with how much more you’re able to feel, plus it’s a super hot way to discover how different types of touch turn you on. Practice a little patience when you’re solo, and I guarantee your next sex session with a partner will have them begging you for more, more, more.
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